Wow! what an insane morning….and insane relates to everything about it…not just the amount of work that had to be completed by lunch time. 

This morning I’ve been up and down an insane emotional roller coaster, teetering on the brink of what i can now call a bit of an emotional meltdown, which finally ended in a flood of tears in the bathroom.  Now let the record reflect, I don’t often cry….I’ve only cried at work twice before…both of those were for valid reasons, bursting into uncontrollable tears for no apparent reason at work is not really my style. 

That being said, sometimes having a good cry is the best medicine in the world.  It serves as an outlet for bottled up emotions and stresses that we don’t always realise we have.  For me….crying and admitting that I was emotionally tired and shattered was a good thing.  I’m feeling a million times better, have a genuine smile on my face and it feels like a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

I’ve decided to make a list of things that i noticed/learned this morning.  A list i can keep and use to remind myself when i need some reminding.

1.  My eyes go insanely green when I’ve cried.  Yes, i realise this is totally random and unimportant and i really don’t need to remember this point…but i observed it today for the first time.  Some form of beauty in the pain or something i guess.
2.  Being there for friends is very important, but you need to remember that all the energy they sap from you needs to be replaced and the emotional turmoil you absorb needs to find an outlet in your mind….if you don’t work through this stuff regularly they do result in little melt downs like this morning
3.  I have an amazing boss…..Upon seeing my teary eyes earlier he gave me a hug and asked if i was OK…he then had the decency to accept my teary smile and nod and go on with our meeting as if having red eyes just happen to be the latest fashion accessory
4.  My best friends are the most awesome beings in the whole entire world.  They love and accept me for who I am.  And regardless of what nonsense may spout forth from my mouth, they just take it all in stride.  Thank you:)
5.  A simple one word sms like, *hugs*, from a friend can have a huge impact on how you’re feeling.
6.  I do believe parents are waaaay underrated.  Mine are the absolute best…and a long talk with mommy letters after said melt down did me the world of good.
7.  Try and avoid putting yourself into stressful situations, such as having to move out of your current home by the end of the month while still not having anywhere to go.  That being said….I’m viewing a place that sounds lovely after work today….please please please hold thumbs and pray that it’s awesome:)
8.  Bottling up emotions really isn’t the wisest course of action….ever.
9.  You need to accept that you can’t fix everything.  You can’t feed all the hungry people, you can’t help every abandoned child, you can’t take away the heartache that friends are experiencing….all you can do is be there. 
10.  There are times when my faith and hope are the only things i have to hold on to….I’m grateful for both of these
11.  It’s OK to have little meltdowns every now and again, just don’t make a habit of it OK?

Anyhoodle…i just wanted to remind you…..You’re loved and cared for, and if you’re wearing your rubyshoes you can accomplish anything.  Chin up:)

Love

The practical Ruby
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So a friend of mine sent this little gem to me:)  I realise that many of you may already have received it via e-mail or otherwise, but it is so cute that i just couldn’t resist.

In preparation for the World Cup, the ‘offside rule’ explained in a language that non sport orientated women can understand:

You’re in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.  Behind the shop assistant on the till is a a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you MUST have…..(as one does) The female shopper in front of you has seen them too and is eyeing them with desire.  Both of you have forgotten your purses (shock horror! that never happens…i can see a male person wrote this…who forgets a purse if you’re going to a shoe store???).  It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.  She prepares to throw her purse to you.  If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.  At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and ‘whilst it is in flight’ you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.
BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has actually been thrown it would be plain wrong for you to be in front of the other shopper and you would be OFFSIDE.

Well girls, I hope this helps you a little:)

Love

Ruby
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The last couple of weeks I’ve been going through a very weird time in my life.  The strangest thing is, i didn’t even realise I was going through this weird time until i starting snapping out of it.  Oh sure, i was aware that things weren’t as they should be, but i couldn’t really put my finger on it until it started setting itself straight again.

Now you may wonder why on earth I’m sending you this letter.  Well, the fact of the matter is, this weirdness I’ve been going through related purely to my work and my studies for some reason.  I’ve always been very passionate about my job and my studies.  I’ve loved it ever since i started, and I’ve always given my 1000%, my time, my strength, my concentration and everything i had to complete my tasks for both work and studies.

The last couple of weeks I’ve been so detached from it all.  I didn’t want to work and i certainly didn’t want to work on my studies.  Sure, i reached all my deadlines and my work was always satisfactory…but for someone who generally loves her job..doing a job because you have to is pure hell.  I’ve always been one of those people that a lot of other people hate because I’m all chipper about going to work in the morning.  But of late, well, I’ve been doing just enough to do everything satisfactory….totally unlike me.

You’ll be glad to know that I’m starting to snap out of it.  Starting today:)  Sure, i realise I’m on sick leave, but i was all inspired today…so even though i was at home I’ve done a lot…and I’m sure tomorrow when i come to work you’ll be pleased with the progress made:)  For you, me snapping out of this pretty much means that my work will not only be satisfactory, but it will be done with a smile, with my normal passion and 1 000% dedication. 

I’ve missed passionate me….and I’m really glad to have me back:)

Regards

Ruby

Today I’ve decided to write a letter to ALL of you using a post inspired by the ‘it’s for you‘ posts that Being Brazen always do.

How it always works: I will answer a few random questions, then you will also answer them in my comments section.  I hope you’ll all have fun participating:)

Today I……decided to trust someone with a little piece of who i am
Last night…..I dreamt that my best friend died in a car accident.  I woke up hysterical and crying and ended up feeling very much uneasy until i received a message from him during the course of the morning.
Right now….I am listening to Nickle Creek (totally awesome band) and writing a blog post.
I would be lying if….I said that i wasn’t maybe, sorta, kinda crushing on a boy person a little.
I love….salsa:)
I wish….i wouldn’t be so hard on myself when i screw up….people make mistakes…it’s normal
Thought for the day……happiness is more important than a lot of things
Song currently stuck in your head……Empire state of mind by Alicia Keys and Jay-Z

Hope you all enjoy answering my questions:)

Love

Ruby

Wow! thank you so much for the awarding me the Beautiful blogger award in your latest post. Such an incredibly sweet thing to say..the award and the beautiful words were very much appreciated:)

For the award I have to tell you 7 things about myself that you do not know and then pass it on to 7 other bloggers that I think are beautiful. A tough one, considering the various meme’s that have been completed on this here blog, but i shall give it a bash anyway:)

1. I have a dream of having a school for fine arts one day. Dancing, singing, acting, music..all of it. To promote the love there of in the hearts of the youth and those not privileged enough to be exposed to it all the time

2. I have moments of extreme loneliness…I’ll be surrounded by people who love and care for me and yet i feel like I’m all alone in the world, like nobody knows me. I’m grateful that these moments are very rare though:)

3. There is something about me that only a very limited amount of people know. Most of them respect it, but very few of them understand it.

4. I have a fascination for knives and swords. I own a swords and a couple of knives too 🙂

5. I’m a bit of a Pyro

6. I love children. Child abuse, starving children and other bad things that affect children really hits me in the gut. I used to volunteer at the government hospital while I was studying and visited the children’s ward once a week. I’d play with them, tell them stories, sing them to sleep, hold the babies, help feed them and generally give them the attention the nursing staff couldn’t give them, even though they wanted to. Some of those kids had been there for weeks and weeks on end with nobody coming to visit them. I always went home in tears and generally spent the rest of the evening feeling as if somebody ripped my heart out.

7. Today is the 10th anniversary of my favourite uncle’s death. He was an incredible human being. The last thing he said to me while i was visiting him in hospital was ‘you are beautiful, everything about you is beautiful…don’t ever lose that. You’re so passionate about life, i wish i could see where you will be in 10 years’ He died that night. Well my darling uncle, today is 10 years later…I hope I can say that you’d be proud of the person I’ve become:)

So now i get to award it to 7 other bloggers🙂 Many of you have already been awarded this specific award, so if you get a second one from me….deal with it ok?
So my awards go to:
1. Louisa – Fantastic and super interesting person. Doing the single mommy thing and generally making life fun and interesting 🙂
2. Being Brazen – she has the most insightful posts, often learn things over weekends and is a sweet and wonderful blogger person
3. Jessica – a lovely lady that I’m grateful I’ve gotten to know. Truly beautiful both on the in and the outside.
4. Phillygirl – my beautiful and darling friend, *hugs* you’re incredible:)
5. Doodles – A girl after my own heart…she’s like my carbon copy, and if i win the award so does she:)
6. Arkwife – My friendster…i love you…you are beautiful:)
7. My terrivle twin – one of the most amazing and interesting people ever…she is awesome and beautiful and you’ll love her to bits!

Love
Ruby
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P.S. Gauteng is empty without you hun🙂