A little something I learnt

I recently learnt a little something. Truth be told it’s probably something I’ve always known, but being forced to face the reality of it has been good for my soul. The truth is….no one gives a damn.

Let me catch you up. If you follow me on twitter or Instagram, you will be well aware of the fact that I recently went on a long and incredibly beautiful holiday. The trip related blog posts are still a WIP but they will hopefully be up soon enough. We spent a number of days in Serbia and then slowly made our way to Croatia and finally spent the last 2 weeks on an island off the coast of Croatia. It was delightful, and we spent a lot of time soaking up the sun and swimming in the mirror like Adriatic Sea.

While I was packing for this exquisite trip the Gypsy and his mom (who lives on the island!!!!) advised that I pack more than one bathing suit/bikini/whatever tickles my fancy as we will spend a lot of time swimming and sunbathing and sometimes having a second one to change into so that you don’t walk around in wet gear is nice. The swim wear packing caused me a bit of stress and frustration…and here’s why.

I am currently over weight. Don’t get me wrong…I’m not obese…I’m not FAT….i’m not HUGE, but I am over weight in that I have curves, I could definitely stand to lose some weight and I’m probably the biggest I’ve ever been in my life. It’s caused me a lot of frustration of late because I eat healthy, I exercise, I sleep better and I drink a ton of water, yet nothing seems to make a difference. I tried to lose weight in the months preceding our trip, but because I was traveling all the time before we left this wasn’t as easy as I had hoped.

The really funny thing is, even though I could definitely stand to lose some weight I don’t have massive issues about it. Because, while my ex was all about body image and being fit and trim and thin and concerned about what other people think, the Gypsy smothers me in love and attention and tells me how beautiful I look (even when I really don’t…bless his soul). Without realising it he led me to a space in recent months of focusing on being healthy rather than thin and being happy and comfortable in my own skin. It’s been an amazing journey and one I am certainly grateful for. It doesn’t mean that I don’t still aim to lose the weight…it just means I’m not obsessing about it. And that makes me a lot healthier in all aspects.

But back to my original story. The whole point of the above explanation was to make it clear that I am most certainly NOT bikini ready. In addition, I’m extremely self-conscious about the huge scar running all across my diaphragm area as a result of the gangrene related butchery, which has caused me to rather wear tankini tops of late. Not to mention the fact that in my entire adult life (even when I was much thinner) I don’t think ever wore ONLY a bikini. I always wore a pair of swim shorts. It was just the thing to do when you didn’t exactly look like a runway model. Everyone did it that way and quite frankly there are always comments about the less than model like people who dare to walk around in only bikinis.

So I packed two tankinis and a pair of swim shorts. On the day of our departure the Gypsy managed to convince me to pack my bikinis too, stating that I might change my mind and regret not being able to get  a better tan while I was there. I laughed at the thought but shoved two in my suitcase (just in case), mostly to humour him.

When we got to the island and went for our first swim I confidently went out in my tankini and swim shorts…because this is what I always do. But I ended up abandoning the tankini tops within two days and the swim shorts two days later. For the first time in my adult life I was swimming, walking around and sun bathing in a bikini ONLY in PUBLIC! The horror!

But here’s a thing I learnt from the locals about body image. NOBODY CARES! The island was covered in locals walking/swimming/sunbathing in the smallest garments you could possible imagine and sometimes even nude. It didn’t matter if you were small, big or quite frankly huge….you wore whatever you wanted to…and nobody even gave a second glance. There was none of the sniggers and whispers I had grown accustomed to in SA when a really massive middle aged woman started walking around in the tiniest bikini I had ever seen. In fact, no one but me even gave her a second glance.

I’ve learnt that South African are actually pretty damn judgemental. I learnt that the only person truly judging me for how I look is me and the ONLY person causing me to be self-conscious about how I look and what I dress in is me. I learnt to get over myself….and it was an amazing and freeing moment.

It helped that the Gypsy’s only reaction when I finally appeared in a bikini only was to give me a hug and a kiss, gleefully exclaim that he’s so happy that I’m finally completely comfortable and then proceed to tell me that he has no idea what I was on about, because I look fabulous. (this guy…so sweet)

So the lesson I learnt: nobody cares. So embrace who you are! Stop worrying and have fun. Life is too short to worry about other people will think when most of them don’t matter anyway. Life is definitely too short to put off doing things because you don’t look the right way. Live in the moment and embrace where you are. Because NOBODY CARES!

2016…..

2016 has been a rather interest year for many reasons. Work has been crazy…although to be fair I suppose my work/life balance always goes just a tad out of whack in terms of the work craziness. I am a workaholic and while I don’t measure my success on how busy I am and how little time I have outside of work, the facts are that I love being busy, I love my job and for the most part I don’t mind the extra hours.
2016 has however taught me to focus on the rest and relaxation and on the “life” part of work/life balance too. To invest in quality, happy time with the people I care about more often.

If all goes according to plan, 2016 will also be the first time in 10 years that my little family gets to spend Christmas all together….My parentals, my bro, my SIL, my two beautiful nephews and myself all together for a crazy cold and *hopefully* white Christmas. I CAN’T WAIT!

2016 has also been the year where (hold on to your horses) I started cycling. It’s a crazy thought…me on a bicycle…but it is true. I got dragged along earlier this year on a cycle and since then I’ve actually grown to love my Saturday mornings in the saddle. I’ve grown to appreciate the tender nether regions after 2.5 hours in the saddle, grown to appreciate the stiff muscles and the aching wrists. Because once I get to the end of my ride I feel like I’ve accomplished something. And not only that…I’ve been afforded the opportunity to be healthy, to completely zone out from everyone and everything for the time that I was on the bike and to be grateful for what I am able to do.

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And last but not least 2016 has been the year where my romantic journey with The Gypsy began. I’ve been alluding to his existence on twitter for a while and if you follow me on Instagram you would have seen his face creeping into my timeline. There isn’t much to the story really. Fact is I’ve known him for a few years but I’ve never even considered a romantic relationship because I’ve always had someone else. And I am one of those people who never even consider or think about the possibility with anyone else when I’m with another.

But somewhere between breaking up with the Guy Person and grabbing 2016 by the horns, The Gypsy once again popped into my story….and this time he appeared to play the role of the potential leading man. Once he became aware of my newly single status he simply asked that once I am ready to move on I give him a chance. And due to the circumstances around the breakup and the 6 months preceding it I was ready a hell of a lot sooner than I had anticipated. And somewhere in between the cycling and laughing and late night chats and dinners and random whatsapp conversations he became more than just a friend.


He’s weird…I’m weird…and we are completely and perfectly weird together. My relationship with him is so different from every other relationship I’ve ever had and his European frankness is refreshing and in stark contrast with most other guys I know, let alone guys I’ve dated. A spade is a spade is a spade and no topic is too awkward…apparently.

I love how we can passionately and heatedly debate on different sides of an issue the one minute and laugh and hold hands the next, not allowing a difference of opinion to cause anger and irritation. I love how he appreciates the fact that I am opinionated and independent and how he isn’t threatened or intimidated by my personality, independence or my sometimes scary and hectic job. I love how he respects my faith, beliefs and choices. I love how he is constantly encouraging me to grow and do new things and how he not only welcomes but insists that I always speak my mind. I love how he chooses the moment I probably look at my worst to stare at me in wonder and tell me how beautiful I am…it’s all really lame and really corny and really awesome.

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And while I have absolutely no idea what the rest of 2016 will hold I know that this year I have chosen to live in the moment and that so far, despite the fact that it hasn’t always been moonlight and roses, 2016 has been good. It has been filled with new beginnings and adventure and challenges and it has presented me with a million ways to make new memories.

P.S. So subsequent to this blog post 2016 got even better when a LOT of hard work, all nighters and mentorship resulted in a promotion announcement on Thursday *grin*.

The thing about hindsight

So here’s the thing about hindsight….it is 20/20…it is perfect vision..it is all revealing, unsympathetic and brutal….it is honest.

I must be honest.  Since the break up I haven’t exactly spent time mulling over things or replaying events and conversations or missing the guy person (shock horror, I know) or remembering moments or wondering about things or him.  It’ s weird I guess…but it’s the kind of person I am. Once I’m done with something….I AM DONE.

But recent events and things and people have forced me to spend at least a bit of time evaluating my previous relationship. And hindsight, that cow, has shown me a few things I didn’t like seeing.  There was A LOT wrong with our relationship even before the ex guy person’s personality made a complete 180 due to medical reasons.

I’ve been looking back at a few of these and I’m shaking my head…at myself. How on earth did I let it come to that?! I am a strong, independent, stubborn, vocal girl…how did I get to that point in a relationship where I was OK with him being THAT selfish, with me sacrificing THAT much of who I was and what I wanted, with me LETTING myself be treated in a certain way. I look at a big portion of our relationship and I want to smack myself..because none of it makes sense.  I mean it didn’t start out that way……but it became that way, and I wish I could fully understand why.

What I need to point out here is that I don’t blame him for this…this was a mutual path of destruction.  Sure he acted in certain ways, but I let him….the blame is as much mine as it is his. Additionally please don’t read this and think that he was mean or awful or a horrible person…he wasn’t. He wasn’t a bully and he wasn’t mean and he didn’t treat me badly.  It’s more a matter of treating me as an after thought rather than a priority…and I have no idea how we got there…because that’s not where we started.

The only explanation I have is that I think we are more inclined to skip over things that bother us or skip over our own needs and our own dreams when we get so caught up in someone else needs and wants and dreams. Perhaps because I truly believed everything would return to the way it should be post op and because I truly believed he was my forever person I was more inclined to ignore myself and my needs and focus on him and his instead…all the time. I don’t know…all I know is that personality change aside there was no way we would have survived past the break up date. Hindsight…it’s a wonderful and awful thing all at the same time.

The last few months have been interesting, but I am happy, I am busy, I am living my best life right now and doing the things that make my soul content. I’ve never been a person who needed someone to be happy…..and it’s nice to be back to being me. Life has been filled with happy moments and big plans and working on making dreams and goals realities rather than a pie in the sky.

And while hindsight might be perfect and perfectly brutal it has also been doing an amazing job and confirming that I made the BEST decision. So I guess I should give myself some credit and maybe a high 5 and a glass of wine to celebrate.

 

 

On making choices

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So the facts are fairly simple….I haven’t blogged in a VERY VERY long time. There are a number of reasons for this, but I’m fairly certain I can link the lack of writing to the difficult and straining couple of months I’ve endured. There was no motivation or energy or wanting to blog…because who wants to chat to the world when your own personal world is filled with pitfalls and slowly falling apart.  This general lack of everything even made it’s way to my twitter profile where I have, without any doubt, been more quite than ever before, not to mention the lack of socializing with my friends.

The facts are that I’ve never been good at sharing my own emotions and struggles. For the most part i prefer keeping my cards close to my chest, fighting my own battles (emotionally and otherwise), helping others with their struggles and generally dealing with my own issues in my own way, in my own time and without any help from others. It’s not always the healthiest way to live life, but it’s what I’m good at. I’m good at compartmentalizing and generally shelving issues in my mind.

So this is not a “I’m trying to cope emotionally” or a “Please give me a hug I’m suffering” or a “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing“, or a “OhMiGosh what have I done” or even a “I’m trying to figure things out” type of post.  It’s more of an “FYI this happened and I’m OK with it” kind of post. A post of hope, a post that helped me realise I’ve made the best possible decision for me and others. A post about making healthy and positive choices and embracing them.

In the last 7 months I’ve been taking incredible strain personally.  The guy person went for a very serious operation in June (out of respect for him and his wishes I’m not really willing to share a lot of detail about this here). The operation and the time spent in hospital in itself was crazy stressful on him, on me and on us. Little did we know that this was only the start of it.

I didn’t realise it at first  but his entire personality had changed subsequent to the operation. So much so that by the time i finally realised what was going on I barely recognized the man I had grown to love insanely. We were struggling….I was struggling and taking huge emotional strain. And I dealt with it in the same way I always do. I shelved the emotions and focused on work. I put in an insane amount of billable time and kicked ass professionally (at least that part of my life wasn’t falling apart).

We eventually sat down for a serious talk in November when the truth finally hit me like a TRUCK. He had changed…a lot…we weren’t really working. We were always irritated and frustrated and i had stopped being myself around him. I was tense and unhappy and his moodiness and grumpiness had started affecting me in more ways than i could possibly imagine. We decided that we needed some space while he sought medical advice.

And it was during this “space” period where it dawned on me. Suddenly I was happy, I could BREATHE again, I could live and laugh and just be my usual carefree self. It was a really HARD thing to realise. I love this man, or rather I love the man he was, not the person he became. As such I started dealing with a “break up” without even breaking up with him and when I finally made an appointment to see him at the start of January to make it official we both knew it was the best decision for both of us.

Do I blame him? Most certainly not. This was not his fault or his choice…..but it is what it is and at some point I needed to make healthy decisions for me. I was caught in an unhealthy situation and I needed to get out.

Am I OK? More than. I realised very quickly that due to the 2 months of “space” we had, I had already emotionally dealt with the break up. I made the final decision in December already after having a long discussion with my parents (who know and love the guy person) and they agreed with me. I spent my December holiday making peace with this decision and realising that life goes on.

Do i feel like I quit on him? I must admit I struggled with this the most at first.  I felt like i was choosing to take the easy way out. Like i was quitting on him, on us and on everything we had built in the last 2 years.  But the simple facts that I have come to realise and which he himself reminded me of are as follows:  (a) This is not working (b) I fought hard for him and for us for 6 months, I didn’t take the easy out (c) I can’t fix the situation because it’s not within my control (d) It takes courage to walk away from an unhealthy situation.

So….after 2 years and many many happy moments I am single again. It’s a bit surreal. And it was hard walking away from the person that, till not so long ago I was convinced was my forever person.

The thought of going out and meeting people and going on dates and having to run the gauntlet of dating is quite frankly looking exhausting. And I suspect unless I meet someone in my day to day life as it is now I’ll probably be single for a while. But here is the important thing: I AM OK WITH THAT. 

I’ve always been quite happy to be single. I don’t need someone to complete me. I don’t need someone to enjoy my life, and I certainly don’t need another person to make me happy.

So 2016 has certainly started with a BIG BANG, but I certainly hope it’ll be better and happier than 2015.

A little something on how life gets in the way

My dearest readers, once again I find myself in a position where I look at my poor little blog and realise just how badly I’ve abandoned it of late.  I somehow feel like a bit of a bad mother, life I’ve forsaken my only child or something.  But here’s the thing….luckily a blog is not a child and even though I feel terrible for being so quiet on here, I know the reasons for my silence better than anyone.

You see, so far this year has been amazing and horrible and hard and exciting all rolled into one. And being faced with all of this has made it hard for me to formulate my thoughts into words and more than that…some of what I’ve experienced I didn’t want to share…it was mine to deal with, mine to struggle with, mine to enjoy and mine to share when I was ready to do so.

So without going into too much detail, here are the facts:

  • I met a guy…..a pretty awesome one in fact
  • I was unemployed for nearly 6 months (a very very stressful time for me)
  • I was grateful for my uncanny ability to stow away money for rainy days….I survived 6 months and still have some left
  • I visited my bro in the States for 2 weeks earlier this year and met my dearest Baby B (who is no longer a baby) in real life for the first time and fell completely in love with him
  • I spend more and more time on Skype missing my family and especially my nephew
  • I was given an amazing opportunity with an amazing company as an external consultant (so I’m still my own boss)
  • I spent 3 months out in the middle of nowhere South Africa catching bad guys and only returning home for a couple of hours a week
  • I realised how spoiled we are in Jozi with the amazing signal……middle of nowhere SA has very little signal
  • The future is looking rosy again
  • My circle of friends shrunk and I realised who my true friends were
  • When my best friend is struggling with things, I struggle….I can’t help it….I wish I could make it better
  • I’m finally back in Jozi (for the time being anyway

You see…life does this silly little thing of getting in the way and we become so busy that we no longer have time for the things we enjoy doing.  I love writing and pouring my heart out here on my little blog…but sometimes it’s just not possible to do this.  But here I am…back (for now) and ready to once again fill your life with useless information:P

So for now…let me fill your life with some beauty, courtesy of #MiddleOfNowhereSA and the Americas

Frozen river with a railway bridge......most amazing thing i've seen in a while
Frozen river with a railway bridge……most amazing thing I’ve seen in a while
Mirror mirror
Mirror mirror
More America Gorgeousness! I LOVE snow
More America Gorgeousness! I LOVE snow
Now this....this is Africa...courtesy of #MiddleOfNowhereSA
Now this….this is Africa…courtesy of #MiddleOfNowhereSA

 

My Dearest Cuz

So I realise it’s been more than a month since the wedding, but with being on holiday and then trying to get back into routine and work and everything else, I haven’t really had a chance to write about it.

So, on 10 August 2013, my cousin (and for all emotional reasons one of my 3 younger sisters) got married.  The engagement and all the planning had been a long process, but the day had finally arrived and we were all terribly excited:) I was Maid of Honor and had worked my butt of with various things including organizing the dresses, the bridal shower, to name but a few. But on this spectacular day my main objective was to make sure i had a solution in my magical suitcase for any problem that might rear its ugly head (this included everything from extra bras for the girls, to glue, to needle and thread, to a knife, to a first aid kit, to champagne and food for the bridal party and the make up artist…amongst other things) and most importantly to keep the bride calm.

My dearest cuz, you made the last part pretty hard. Not because you were super stressed or anything, but because you were so excited that keeping you still long enough to let the hair dresser and make up artist do their magic became nearly impossible.  You had a few severely emotional moments, a few moments where the stresses of the day got hold of you, but mostly you were just excited.  Helping you to get dressed along with your mother while the photographer did her thing left me with a tear in the eye….the day was finally here and you looked so incredibly beautiful.

The ceremony was very special and very “you” and we all had a giggle as you, like the tomboy you are, did a bit of an airpunch when your groom took hold of you and gave you a passionate kiss, claiming you as his wife:) The  tables were beautiful and we all had an amazing time catching up with family and friends alike.  And then your dear husband caught me totally off guard when, after finishing his entire speech and all the thank yous, he asked me to stand and gave me my very own, long thank you speech. I was reduced to tears for the second time that day. It wasn’t necessary, your smile and the happiness that oozed from your very being was thanks enough to be honest, but it was mightily appreciated. And even though some things had cause me lots of frustration and work I would do it again in a heartbeat:)

Love you long time my cuzzy:) xxxxx

P.S. I’m adding some of the pictures taken with my camera and my phone on the day. There weren’t a lot of the bridal couple, but if my cousin lets me i’ll post some of the photographers pics as soon as we have them:)

Posing with the bride before getting ready. Her hair had been done here but nothing else was ready yet:)
Posing with the bride before getting ready. Her hair had been done here but nothing else was ready yet:)
There had to be an awkward selfie as I am the queen of the awkward selfies:) Also, it kinda shows my hairpiece...which is technically an extra lapel piece that we changed to a hairpiece:P
There had to be an awkward selfie as I am the queen of the awkward selfies:) Also, it kinda shows my hairpiece…which is technically an extra lapel piece that we changed to a hairpiece:P
The beautiful bride, dressed and posing with her ring bearer:)
The beautiful bride, dressed and posing with her ring bearer:)
The bridal party....and no i have no idea what i was doing here. But aren't my two cousins (a.k.a. younger sisters) gorgeous?
The bridal party….and no i have no idea what i was doing here. But aren’t my two cousins (a.k.a. younger sisters) gorgeous?
The bride post ceremony making a funny
The bride post ceremony making a funny
How unbelievable are the colours of these orchids used in the decorations?
How unbelievable are the colours of these orchids used in the decorations?
The bride's parents (a.k.a the replacements) finally getting a chance to rest:)
The bride’s parents (a.k.a the replacements) finally getting a chance to rest:)
Mister and Missus cousin enters the reception
Mister and Missus cousin enters the reception
Cousins!!!! The one in the middle traveled all the way from Umkomaas to be there:)
Cousins!!!! The one in the middle traveled all the way from Umkomaas to be there:)
Posing with the father of the bride...a.k.a my other dad:)
Posing with the father of the bride…a.k.a my other dad:)
With the parentals:) I have no idea what i did and why i'm laughing so much and my dad is giving me a strange look...but I just adore this picture of the 3 of us. Love these two people so much:)
With the parentals:) I have no idea what i did and why i’m laughing so much and my dad is giving me a strange look…but I just adore this picture of the 3 of us. Love these two people so much:)

Dear 2012

I can hardly believe that I’m sitting here writing my annual “end of year” blog already. It feels like just yesterday that I was jetting off to the States to see in the new year in Times Square with my closest friend.  But here I am, looking back and reflecting on the year that’s been.  My initial reaction when thinking about this year is that it was a really really tough one…but it wasn’t all bad. There was a lot of good contained in this year too…a lot of happy moment shared by myself and the ones I consider dear to me.

Every year I write a little post listing big events or things I’ve learnt and this year shall be no different.  Please feel free to add anything I’ve missed in the comment sections…since you guys share such a big part of my life anyway:)

  • I kicked of the year with a massive party in my favourite city in the whole world.  My close friend and I traveled to the States to conquer Washington DC and New York and to party in Time’s square along with millions of other people.  It was one of the most memorable experiences of my entire life, and to be honest when I think about it I can almost not believe that I was really there:)

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  • The rest of our holiday in the US and I extended my stay with a week to go visit my brother and sister-in-law.
  • I get to spend my brother’s birthday with him for the first time in many years

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  • I felt Baby B (nephew) kick for the first time and I accompanied my sister-in-law on one of her visits and was able to hear his little heart beat.  I’m not broody at all…never have been. But hearing that little heart beat…my eyes filled with tears and that little baby stole my heart right then and there…even though he was still a few months away from being born.
  • The Italian somehow managed to squeeze over my walls and swept me off my feet…sadly it didn’t last and later in 2012 we broke up.

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  • After months of waiting (having ordered it in October 2011 already) and secret keeping (very few people knew) my gorgeous and epic car arrived in January. My little MINI, spec’d to a level of crazy and exactly as I wanted it:) MINI FTW!!!
  • For the first time I was faced with the harsh realities of being self-employed. It’s a scary world and I’m grateful that it was only a small scare.
  • My gran became seriously ill and was admitted to a hospital in Durban.  I flew down for one night as we were all convinced she wouldn’t make it thought the weekend.  I return to Jozi broken-hearted, convinced I’d never speak to her again
  • My gran makes a miraculous recovery from the pneumonia and is sent home…but the cancer is back with a vengeance and we all know it won’t be long.
  • My close friend got engaged to the girl who stole his heart:)
  • Early one morning I ended up in ER with everyone convinced I was having a heart attack.  Biggest SCARE EVER! I made hospital art after the ECG.

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  • I move into a new home.  I LOVE it! probably twice the size of my previous place and I have a little garden.
  • I meet the neighbourlady…which in the few months that I’ve lived in the new place, has become an amazing friend.
  • My gran passed away peacefully while taking an afternoon nap. I think this was the one single event that shaped my opinion of this year. It broke me. Utterly and completely.  She was the strongest most amazing woman, she was my best friend and just like that she was no longer with us.  I still feel my eyes filling with tears just thinking about it.  I miss her so very much.
  • Baby B is born the day after my gran passed away. The most beautiful and perfect little boy and despite not actually being able to hold and cuddle him he has stolen my heart:)

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  • My mother receives my grandmother’s Ruby ring that my grandfather gave her on their 40th wedding anniversary and she decides to give it to me. Ruby being my birthstone and all. (happy tears) I wear it every single day:)

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  • A rather scary event (work related) forces me to reconsider my chosen profession.  I love my job…but is it worth the danger I put the people I love in?  It took weeks of prayer, planning and a lot of personal analysis to figure this one out.
  • I took my parentals to see my dad’s all time favourite band when they were in SA – The Moody Blues…what an awesome concert!

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  • I turned the big three oh.  Most other people I know had a little episode when they realise they were turning 30…me not so much.  If nothing else it has brought me to a place in my life where I’m less concerned about what others think and more about the happiness of myself and the ones I love.  It’s brought a new confidence and a happiness all on its own.  So I’m 30..so what…age is just a number:) It has also brought along a new motto: Some will, some won’t, so what, next.
  • I went to see Madame Zingara and became part of the show:P

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  • My mother had to go for a really big operation and I was a complete wreck.  Grateful that I was in a position where I was able to work from their home for a week and look after her.
  • Christmas 2012…our first without my gran…a joyful and sad event.
  • It’s been a year of incredibly long hours and hard work and a lot of pressure work wise. I still haven’t quite figured out how to relax…I’m trying my best to master this art though:P  But I still tend to go overboard and work myself to the edge of a burnout.
  • I’ve learnt that no matter how hard you try, for some people nothing will ever be good enough.
  • The ones who hurt us the most are the ones we trust and love the most, because it is to them that we open our hearts, our dreams, our desires and our weaknesses.
  • I’ve once again realised that you can make really good friends in the most unlikely of places.
  • Not everyone who proclaims to be your friend will treat you as such.
  • True friends are worth more to me than any riches
  • People will judge and oppose that which they do not understand.
  • It has been a long year…I’m beyond tired and I’m still working.  No holiday plans for me yet and it was with shock that I realised that I haven’t been off since returning from the States in January.  Not a weekend away, not a weekend off, mostly work work work and more work. But it has been a good year and despite some events that made it seem like a yucky year I have been blessed.  I realise that a lot of people who read my blog do not share my beliefs when it comes to God, but how can I say goodbye to a year without including the most important part of who I am and what I believe.  God has provided me with a lot of grace and love and understanding and comfort this year.  He has also blessed me in ways I can not even begin to explain or even comprehend.  He is my Rock:)

Well my lovelies, I think that about sums it up. My 2012 in a nutshell.
As far as 2013 goes…I think this is going to be a big year all round.  There are many exciting things in the pipeline…weddings, engagements, work things, friend things, family things and hopefully some epic holidays and fun times with the people dear to me.  I wish you guys all the best for 2013.  Make every single day count.  Do what makes you happy. Take responsibility for your actions. Tell the people you love that you love them as often as you can…they might not have a tomorrow. Laugh a lot. Dance and be silly.  Work hard.  Do your best in all you do. 2013…look out, we’re coming for you!

Love
Ruby
xxxx